Even Worse Than Death March 10, 2012
Posted by ijwoods in Blog+.Tags: caregiver, caregiving, dying at home, Ira Baycock
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“When someone we love is diagnosed with a life-threatening condition, the worst thing we can imagine is that he or she might die. The sobering fact is that there are worse things than having someone you love die. Most basic, there is having the person you love die badly, suffering as he or she dies. Worse still is realizing later on that much of his or her suffering was unnecessary.” That’s an excerpt of a forthcoming book The Best Care Possible by Ira Byock, a long time palliative care physician, advocate for improved end-of-life care, and a past president of the American Academy of Hospice and Palliative Medicine.
After reading that excerpt I realized that part of the inspiration I had in creating this site came exactly from that line of thinking. Although the care giving I provided to K required a lot physically, it came naturally and lovingly. It was a very intimate experience for the both of us. On the other hand, the mental pressures definitely took a toll on me and one of the big ones was the concern that I would do something to cause K pain or harm. Both during and afterwards there was a intensive replaying of events in my mind looking for ways I could have improved her situation or handled things better. Many people have told me to not go there, but that’s easier said than done and the reality is that I could have used more information and help. It of course does me little good now. (more…)
50/50 March 1, 2012
Posted by ijwoods in Blog+.Tags: 50/50 moviie, Chemo, chemotherapy, effects of chemo
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I recently watched the movie 50/50, a comedy inspired by the true story of a 27 year old man who discovers he has cancer and the struggles he encounters. I know it’s hard to imagine a movie about someone battling cancer to be funny but It’s well written and keenly sharp in honing in on some of the more uncomfortable aspects of attempting to live while while going through the fight. It’s an entertaining look into the process, complexity of the relationships and struggles that can be faced, but it’s all done with great warmth. Of course, there’s a lot missing, like the stressful financial aspects and insurance company battles and so on, but a movie can only do so much, and that wasn’t its purpose.
In one part of the movie I was astounded to see the protagonist having to take the public bus system home after going through his regular chemotherapy at the hospital. After watching what K went through I can’t imagine anyone having to do that, particularly with the type of chemo it looked like he was getting; but perhaps it’s not that uncommon. Chemotherapy takes on many forms but from what I have seen it can be an absolutely brutal treatment reducing the person to a thin and terribly weakened state in which sleep becomes the primary activity. (more…)
Conscious Departures 